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August 15, 2019

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Hidden Barriers to a Brighter Future

April 17, 2018

 Your future depends on letting go of thing you might not even realize your holding on to.


Deciding to pursue your dreams takes a lot of nerve, determination and perseverance.  It is scary and uncertain. And for many it remains just a passing thought and never more than a wonderful dream. We have many reason but the real truth is that we hold ourselves back because of emotions, people, circumstances, memories and fears that secretly stand in the way.


For some, their past is whats secretly holding them hostage and preventing them from actually doing something about pursuing that dream. Perhaps you have failed before or watched someone else fail. Maybe your past simply hasn’t seen success in a way that you feel confident enough to reach out. And worst of all, maybe someone, somewhere told you would never achieve anything great.


For others it may be a circumstance that gives them the perception that anything like that just isn’t possible. Or maybe its the opinion about your dream from the people around you that  is holding you back.


Still others are held back by their own fear of stepping out into the unknown. Putting yourself out there and sacrificing certain aspects of the life you’ve grown used to is not easy. Not everyone will be willing to do what it takes. Not everyone can break the chains that bind them to the life they have today to simply “let go” of what holds them back from a greater tomorrow.


Seeing your dream come to pass is an awesome feeling but the journey to achieving it is the real experience that changes your life.  Just to begin that journey requires something special. It requires you to lay aside and let go of the things that are holding you back. Things you you may have not even considered to be holding you back at all. Then you must start believing that nothing is going to stand in your way, especially yourself. Which is, by the way, usually our greatest hurdle.


It doesn’t matter if your dream is of learning how to be a better cook or if you desire desiring to be CEO of a large corporation or a super-star athlete…


Each and every one of us is uniquely qualified to do anything we truly put out hearts and minds on.


Unfortunately, the most common excuses people have for not pursuing their dreams are things they actually things they claim they have no control over when if fact THEY DO!. But sadly most do not even realize the control they have or refuse to admit it out of fear or pride. And still others do understand the control they could have but are unsure of how or simply unwilling to take that control.


Taking control is not as difficult as you may think. Like anything else that’s different than what you are used to doing, it will take effort and desire. You can do anything your heart desires if you will put these three simple rules into place in your life.

  • Don’t be afraid of change.

I’m sure you have heard the old saying before that “Change is the only thing we can be certain of” an it truly is. We are, however, used to being on the defensive side of the changes in life.  When change happens we have become experts in adapting our lives to these changes. But when it comes to switching sides and choosing to change on purpose it becomes a whole different story.


Changing because we want to change is normally something we do not have to do and therefore, if it gets too tough, it is also so very easy to just go back to the way it was.  No harm no foul, you tried right?  Staying where you are is easy, comfortable and safe AND to be quite honest…LAZY! But if you take that step to let go of the the things and habits you are used to so that you can make a change you may just realize there is a whole new fantastic world just outside your door.


Holding onto those things that seem to be good for you today, may be the very reason why you don’t have something better tomorrow.


  • Recognize what’s holding you back.

Second thing we must do is to recognize the things that may be holding us back. Lets face some truth here!  If you have a desire or a dream that has been sitting on the back shelf of your mind then you have things that are holding you back from achieving it. Obviously the first thing you need to ask yourself is ” do I really want to achieve that? If the answer is yes then you absolutely MUST determine every thing that has held you back thus far from achieving it.  To make it simpler; If someone were to ask you why you’re not doing anything about achieving it, what do you tell them?  How many different answers to that question would you have?


Sometimes these reasons may take on a more emotional form, most commonly referred to as “walls”. “We are all hindered by walls of some form or fashion. Most walls are created by fears and emotions of our past. These walls are real and although they were created by one experience or another, often times they affect many other aspects of our lives. When we experience things in life ,we often take the results and make them a “truth” that will always be. That may be a good thing but more times than not these perceived ” truths” become our walls.  Sometimes we do not even know we have these walls until someone or something else is forcing you to break through them. And still sometimes we know they are there and create our own excuses as to why we keep them there. Either way, you have no idea how to move forward in life unless you know what is holding you back.


Our walls come from many different places in our lives. Perhaps you can relate to one of these.


      Other People/ Pride   

Some walls are there because of our own pride. This has always been one of the greatest reasons of failure and downfall in all recorded history.  Maybe we think it would be embarrassing to reduce our position in life if that what it took to move towards our dream.. When I decided to become an author and speaker I defiantly had to realize that my income was about to be greatly reduced and my lifestyle would take a hit. BUT it will be worth it in the end. It is my dream and it no longer matters what people around me today think about it.


It is very important to know that depending on what your dream is you may be held back by what your close family and friends think. Sometimes even they cannot see your dream as you do.   This can be a powerful barrier that holds you back. You cannot control what they think but only you can control if you are going to allow other people’s opinions control you.


Maybe someone betrayed you in the past. Well guess what? It’s over, move on and don’t let that become a trust issue that holds you back from future relationships.  We all need to have trusting personal relationships in order to succeed.


No one has ever achieved any goal alone.  Having a support system of others that you trust and respect is paramount to succeeding at anything in life personally or in business.



Fear is a powerful barrier for everyone. Venturing out into a new direction is always scary. But it’s important to recognize what your afraid of. Perhaps you were not successful at something in the past so you have a fear of trying again. Perhaps you’re afraid to embarrass yourself or let someone down if you’re not successful this time either.   Maybe you are just fearful because you don’t know how to proceed, you are afraid of the obstacles your facing, or have no idea of even how to start. No matter what your reason of giving into this fear is also giving into the “if I had only’s” of life.


Fear can be a powerful life advancing tool if you’ll realize that it is only by overcoming that fear that you achieve and advance in life.


   Negative thoughts.

Negativity is all around us every day. It is important we guard our mind against the songs, movie, conversations and personal speech of negative thoughts. If your mind is overcome with negative thoughts about your ability to achieve your dream, it’s impossible to succeed. We may not even realize that we have these negative thoughts unless someone points them out to us. Letting go of negative thoughts may be one of the most difficult habits to let go of  but with a little bit of effort of making time to point out positive things around you  every day, you can let go of that hidden negative mindset.


If you don’t have a positive attitude about your dream then no one else will either.


      Your dream is NOT a priority.

If you only think about your dream and do tiny things here and there, without making some priority to working on it at least once or twice a week, other less important things in life will certainly take precedence. Consistency is the most important foundation for seeing successful results.


Let go of the comfort of the day to day routine and open up to the adventure of perusing your dream.


      You’re too worried about Perfection.

If you only see life in terms of success or failure, you may have a hard time dealing with inevitable obstacles you are most certainly going to encounter.  Although we all reach for excellence, no one’s perfect. When your plans are not progressing along quite as you want them to, it may be easy for you to just give up.  “If I can’t get it right then I’m not going to do it!”   Letting go of the expectation that you have to perform at a specific level or achieve a certain level will allow you to begin the process of realizing a dream and not walking away from it.


Some of the greatest achievements came to be as an accidental discovery while pursuing a whole different objective

  • Choose to take control.

Choose to take control of the things that you can control but are actually controlling you instead. We all have things in our lives that we have no control over. Things such as the weather or other peoples actions and opinions. While we can’t control everything, we absolutely have total control over our own actions and reaction to these things. That gives us total control over the effect these things have on us and our future. Unfortunately, that’s where many of us fail.


One of the most common areas we fail is relating our past to our future.  If you have ever done something in the past that failed or was too scary to attempt, our mind automatically believes that this will also prove to be true in the future. This misconception is an example of something completely controllable, controlling us. Have you ever been told you weren’t capable of doing something for what ever reason so you didn’t do it and now for some reason you still believe that lie? Or maybe someone special to you doesn’t see you dream with the same passion as you do so you don’t pursue it in fear of what might happen or what they might say.


There are many things that we unknowingly allow to control our actions that in fact we could have complete control over. Still there are those things we have no control over that also effect us. Some of the things we have no control over are good and some are not so good but our reaction to them and whether or not any of these things will hold us back is purely within our own control. We not only need to learn to adapt to but to also adjust to the uncontrollable in our lives and find a way to make the best of these uncontrollable things.


Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to stop allowing things you can control have control over you!


It is only YOU that can realize and understand the things in your life that need to be let go.   Although others can help you identify these things it is still up to YOU to make these changes…..No one can do it for you. It’s your dream not theirs.


Look for further discussions about your happiness and success in upcoming posts. Stay Tuned…Better yet sign up to follow by email!


Thank you for reading. If this or anything here inspires, motivates or touches you in any way Please LIKE, Comment and share freely!


Go make a difference in someone's life. Be the blessing! – j.buck


Copyright 2018 John Buck/ Maximizing Life /   All Rights Reserved

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