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4 Silent Killers of Success (Part 3 of 4)

November 28, 2017

Are you focused on changing the wrong things?


In this short series I want to share with you 4 discoveries I made when I sat down to seriously analyze why I had not found the success I had dreamed of many years ago.


Over the next four posts I will cover each of my 4 Discoveries.


Like most everyone else I have heard, read and seen about all the motivational material anyone can stand in one lifetime. I used to be a junkie for all that stuff until I realized that I was spending more time reading, listening and watching this stuff and getting excited about my dream than I did actually doing something about pursuing it. I also realized that at the same time, I was helping someone else finance their own dream.


I was so caught up in imagining my dream but never really moving forward with achieving it.


Speaking for myself and I believe for many of you, I found that for me there was a sort of disconnect between getting motivated about my dream and actually getting on with achieving it. It was so easy to look forward imaging what it would be like if my dream were to come true but so hard to actually imagine my next step across what usually seemed like a huge gap between where I was right now and what I saw as my dream.  I could describe my view of my dream like looking up to a mountain peak.  I could imagine the beauty of being up there, what the view would be like from the peak, and how much fun it would be skiing down the perfect white slopes. But what I couldn’t see was the road that led up there because it was hidden just beyond the trees in front of me and that is where my focus was…on the trees.  And as I walked through the trees I lost sight of the mountain. In other words I lost sight of my dream. I would catch a glimpse of it again every once in a while but the trees in front of me kept most of my attention. But I discovered that there were silent obstacles that I allowed to stand in my way. Four of them actually.



RECAP- Discovery 1: I had no room for success in my life!

I discovered I wasn’t making time for my own dream. Life has a way of getting out of control. Between work, and family and church and kids activities and friends, then couple that with a personality that will most often say yes to anyone’s request for help and before long my days were either full or I was tired and wanted to rest. I couldn’t figure out how to fit anymore of anything into my already busy life and through all this busyness my dream sort of got lost. I’m not sure of exactly how my life got so busy and my dream so lost, I mean, I didn’t plan on it being that way but at the end of the day, I did know this:

I hadn’t done anything different today than I had done yesterday.

(Click HERE to read post)


RECAP-Discovery 2: Others didn’t share the excitement of my dream as like I did!

Nobody felt the same way about my dream as I did even though I thought they should, or at least would. When I looked around at where I was in my life, the people that surrounded me, my friends and even my family, I realized that they simply did not understand or share in the excitement I had about what I felt was a greater purpose for my life.

(Click HERE to read post)



Discovery 3: I discovered that I was focused on changing the wrong things.


I used to get so pumped up by all those motivational coaches and speakers, all the books, CD’s and DVD’s. It all held life changing information! Didn't it? 


I spent a lot of years trying my best to change who I was to fit who they all said I should be in order to find success.


I tried changing my habits, becoming a goal setter and goal achiever (was never real good at that for some reason), adjusting my daily routine, diet and exercise plans. I tried it all and just like most of my New Year’s resolutions the changes only lasted a few months then I was back to my old habits. Its typically that way for everyone because those changes are so “out of our normal personality” that they are difficult at best to continue in the short term let alone for a lifetime.


Mind you I would try really hard but let’s face it; if you are over 20 years old, you are NOT changing who you are or your habits easily. What I discovered when I thought back on everything I had tried to do in order to see my dream come true was this:  I had directed so much of my focus on making every  change they told me I needed to make that I lost focus on actively doing something proactively towards directly making my dream come true.


I forgot all about the abilities I already possessed; Abilities that I already had that could move me forward towards my dream, even if it was only a little bit at a time. I had been so focused on changing what I was doing and how I was doing it based upon what others said I lacked and should be doing doing, that I forgot that I actually had talents and habits that I could draw on TODAY to actually do something that moved me towards my dream. 


Each and every one of us is is uniquely and individually equipped to succeed at our own dreams.  Above and beyond what anyone else thinks or says we should be doing. 


But let me say this because i believe its very important. I will still read, listen to, watch and go see as much motivational and instructional stuff as I can. There is always some great advice I can apply to my life along the way. I always find some important information that broadens my mind and energize my drive to pursue my dream when the rest of my life seems to drain it.


But please get this point I am trying to make here!

Motivation is only as good as the effort you give to actually doing something you’re motivated about.


If I had put as much effort into the things I could do as I did trying to do everything I was told I needed to do, I would be a lot further along today.


Success in life is not achieved by pure motivation; it is achieved one tiny, not so extraordinary step at a time. But you still have to take them”


Look for further discussions about your happiness and success in upcoming posts. Stay Tuned…Better yet sign up to follow by email!


Thank you for reading. If this or anything here inspires, motivates or touches you in any way Please LIKE, Comment and share freely!


Go! Make a difference in someones life today. Be the Blessing! 


– j.buck


Copyright 2017 John Buck/ Maximizing Life


All Rights Reserved

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